When Dr. Faustus commented on the previous post by observing “All very interesting, but I’m waiting to see a U-boat on these premises” I took it as a challenge. Even treating “U-boat” as a generic signifier for submarines (which is cheating) this turned out to be a surprisingly difficult request, presumably because submarines are expensive military equipment and navies of the world take a dim view of naked female shenanigans involving them. Nonetheless, I finally hit pay dirt in the form of an unattributed ImageFap gallery (hostile javascript warning, back button disabled) featuring numerous photos of three pretty women in and out of uniforms and inside what looks to be a mothballed museum sub:

There’s just the hint of sign visible in one photo that makes me think the sub in question may be the USS Marlin, currently on display in Omaha, Nebraska:

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Here’s another one of those delightful occasions when one of the “filler” photos from a porn photoshoot unexpectedly turns out looking like a fine art photograph. Check out the contrasting emotions on our model’s face as from the “safety” of a small barred cage she watches cruel things done to another model during a Real Time Bondage interactive BDSM live show (the March 8 show):

There’s a measure of sadistic appreciation and enjoyment on her face, I think; and yet perhaps a dose of apprehension too. Will it be her turn, next, to be taken out of the cage and tormented?

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This BDSM drawing (“Big Troubles” by Michradars) is the first time I’ve noticed a unique and fairly recent sex toy like the Ultimate Asslock turning up in an erotic drawing:

Big troubles, indeed. I wonder if that’s gonna be enough lube?

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Making you talk, making you orgasm, making you do whatever she wants, really.

I refer, of course, to the sexy spy-interrogator modeling the deluxe new Agent Noir Neon Wand Kit, as seen on Bondage Blog:

Those of you who persist in the fetish of buying and owning all your clothing and gear exclusively in the color black will be delighted to learn that with the release of this deluxe set, the Neon Wand is finally and for the first time available in black.

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In this real-life anecdote, Miss Margo describes and does her own processing on the male client who asked to be “forced” to eat a dog turd:

I met him in the consultation room at the Studio. He had the physique and overall appearance of a Beluga whale, except that he was not cute.

A Beluga whale in a very expensive suit.

…

He wanted to be “forced” to eat a turd.

“Sorry, I can’t help you with that. Would you like to meet another Mistress?” I stood up to go.

“Not one of your turds! A dog turd!”

I blinked. A dog turd. That’s a new one.

“Are you serious?” I asked.

“Yes!”

“How are we to acquire said dog turd? Did you bring in a dog turd?”

Beluga’s brow furrowed. Apparently this master of strategy had not planned that far ahead.

“Could you get one from someplace?”

I just stared at him. Do you see any dogs around here, halfwit?

He sat there, expectantly. That’s something about rich people: they expect things to be done for them, however unreasonable.

Eventually, I said, “If you pay me for the time it takes, I will try to find you a piece of dog crap.”

“Great!”

So, he paid me for a half-hour session (“I am not looking for dog shit for longer than half an hour,” I told the manager), ran in back to tell the girls oh my God, this freak wants me to go find a dog turd, donned latex gloves, and hit the streets, plastic grocery bag in my back pocket. A veritable Jason was I, on a quest for the golden fleece.

If, like me, you are fascinated by the diversity of human sexual programs, you may enjoy the comment thread discussion of why someone might want this.

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M’lady, your companion has arrived. I would not keep him waiting, if I were you. He looks a bit impatient.

Picture is from Annabel Josheph’s Hall Of Hotness, where it’s attributed to “W., a friend.”

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