October 19th, 2011 -- by Bacchus
The Tickle Nurse Is IN
Tickling therapy. She hates it, but she needs it:
And that’s just one of the alternative therapies this nurse provides!
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October 18th, 2011 -- by Bacchus
Can’t Hide From l33t h4ck1ng Muth4fukk4
Thomas Roche likes to dive into those bullshit sex stories that always get the old media all moist in their collective sex-negative panties, just so he can mock them comprehensively from the perspective of an web citizen who understands about search engines and how you can, y’know, check that shit before you write about it. I admire this, because it takes work as well as wit, and as a lazy half-wit, usually I can’t be bothered; once my advanced spidey sense tells me “this is bullshit”, I typically want to forget I ever saw that stupid headline as rapidly as possible, and thus I get to spend the next three days cursing as people retweet it at me. But Roche makes sex-story-stupidity-debunking funny, and I suspect serves a salutatory educational function while he does it. What’s more, in the process he typically does a better job reporting the actual stories in question than anybody previously has done. This may indeed be what 21st-century journalism looks like, folks!
His latest takedown is of the “ZOMG, sex while skydiving!” story, the breathless headlines about which have been infesting my RSS and twitter feeds of late and causing, thereby, extreme weariness in the finger I’ve been using to click on something else, ANYTHING else, “NO PLEASE FEDERAL NETWORK, I would NOT like to know more!” I’m not even going to link that shit, because Roche did it already and to link it, I’d have to look at it, and that would make my brain hurt more than it already does.
I’m posting this for an entirely different reason, namely, that I just about lost my cookies laughing at this bit in Roche’s story, where he mocks people who write for the web but who don’t seem to possess even the most rudimentary web search skills:
Incidentally, before we get started: multiple news sources (and Gawker) have said that the “original video” of the flying fuck between porn stars Alex Torres (aka Voodoo) and Hope Howell (possibly aka Maryjanesexy and Paige Thomas) was quickly “taken down from YouTube,” and “only fakes” exist. I have to tell you, if I got my porn from YouTube, I would think babies were made by Florida blondes in bikinis telling me about the Transitive Verb of the Day. Yes, the forces of decency did conspire to keep that video out of Gawker’s hairy palms. But I am one l33t h4ck1ng muth4fukk4. I did have to pull out some serious Neuromancer-era cyberpunk mojo to find the video that the FAA doesn’t want you to see, but after changing into my black PVC catsuit and Converse Hi-Tops, putting on night-vision goggles, drinking a six-pack of Jolt and eating a box of Hot Pockets while listening to Skinny Puppy at top volume, I “hacked the mainframe” and scored that tasty morsel of thoughtcrime contraband! I liberated that dirty video even though it was kept in a secure location guarded by Pentagon infobots…on Alex Torres’ website. Information wants to be free!
Muah ha ha ha ha, I can’t stop laughing.
October 17th, 2011 -- by Bacchus
Really Tall Showers?
I’m not at all certain what we’re looking at in this gem from Usenet. Is that shower heads in some really ornate and outsized ancient baths? I dunno, but I like it:
October 13th, 2011 -- by Bacchus
Tarzan’s Erection: Erased
Remember this Frank Frazetta painting detail I posted way back in 2005?
It turns out that in the original piece:
Tarzan was shown with a huge erection. This made the piece. One of the slave girls was looking down at the erection with obvious lust in her eyes. The Queen was lifting herself off the throne and thrusting her pubic area toward Tarzan. Great Frazetta ribald humor! A masterpiece. Frank put a lot of work into the details.
Alex wanted it. Frank said that he would have to remove the penis. Alex agreed. I was thoroughly despondent sitting there watching this scenario play out before my eyes. “My God, Frank, you can’t take out that penis. It will ruin the piece.” I said it calmly and quietly while Alex was looking at other potential acquisitions. Frank simply said: “I can draw another one.” I’ve heard this before and it never happened. Alex was willing to pay 45K for the piece.
Frank got out his gouache bottles and a little water. In a few minutes he had scraped off the penis and flawlessly filled-in the open area. He matched every tone perfectly. It was an amazing thing to see. It is impossible to see that anything different was there before.
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October 13th, 2011 -- by Bacchus
Howl, Puppies, Howl!
This is said to be from the movie Salo. But for some reason, it reminds me of the visual style of Ellen von Unwerth:
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October 11th, 2011 -- by Bacchus
Penis Extender Sheath In Use
After sex blogging for as long as I have been, it’s rare to come across something I haven’t seen before. But it does happen.
For instance, I’ve been aware that sheaths to fit over and extend the length/size of a man’s penis have been around for a long time, and are an item in commerce. I’ve even posted pictures of some vintage versions here on ErosBlog.
But men who, y’know, would like a little more size — they don’t tend to be very outgoing about it. Which may explain why I’ve never seen a picture of anybody actually wearing one of these extension devices.
